I never knew how wise my father, Russ Jordan, was until I got to know him better after my mother passed away in 1998. I was so inspired by his life that I decided to write a book, “DADLY Wisdom,” to celebrate fathers and their special wisdom.
I asked friends for referrals of wise fathers throughout the world, in order to honor the global voice of fatherhood. I interviewed fathers for a few years; but after amassing a stack of notes about a foot high, I was so overwhelmed, that I put the pile in the closet!
Meanwhile, I focused on other work; but I knew my book on dads needed to be finished. I owed it to the dads—and to the world who needed the inspiration of their rich stories.
Then, in 2013, after being severely injured in a bike accident, the time came to complete the book. Down on my back in a rehab hospital, I knew that I had been stopped to finish the book. It seemed impossible because I was right-handed and had no use of the right side of my body.
My father, though, taught me to “do the deal of life,” in spite of any limitations.
Thus, before he died from cancer, he went to chemotherapy and then golfed with his friends. When he lacked the energy to walk the course, he rode in the cart. When he could no longer swing the club, he still rode in the cart with his friends.
He passed away in 2010, but as the daughter of a dad who lived as fully as he could, I knew that I must overcome my trials to share his wisdom and that of other fathers with the world. I started writing with my left hand and used voice articulation software to type.
I interviewed many more fathers, who were thrilled to share about their love for their kids. They showed me pictures and told me stories of pride and hardship as a dad.
They talked about the challenge of not having a roadmap to navigate fatherhood. They shared about such difficulties as balancing work and family, and surviving the tragic loss of one or more of their kids.
As they shared openly with me about their experiences as a father, I sensed that no one had ever asked them. More attention had been on the mothers, and the dads did not get the acknowledgment which they deserved. My goal with DADLY Wisdom was to give them this recognition.
Through this quest, I found that the hallmark trait of wise fathers was humility. As they told their stories of love for their families, dedication to their professions, and commitment to helping their communities, I felt as if I were listening to Saints. I wanted to shake them and say, “Don’t you know how great you are!” They would’ve shaken their head no; and besides, worldly prestige was not their pursuit. They did the right thing as dads because it was the right thing to do. As retired golf pro, Jerry Cosby, told his talented golfing sons, “Post the score,” and don’t be concerned about applause. Such was the spirit of the fathers. They “post the score” by being great fathers, giving their all to the deepest mission of their lives— being a father.
The wise fathers were also optimistic, self-sacrificing, and men of faith. None claimed perfection and laughed at the thought.
They had a spirit of service and contributed to the world however they could. One helped the AIDS victims in Africa, and another helped widows and children in Afghanistan.
They shared kernels of wisdom, such as Erik Arnesen’s advice to “paddle out,” not just to surf, but for bigger waves in the ride of life.
High-profile men such as, Congressman Alan Lowenthal, and Chris Steinhauser, Superintendent for the Long Beach Unified School District, made time amidst busy schedules to share their love for their kids and to pass on their life’s wisdom.
Regardless of how successful the fathers were, they treasured being a father most of all. As Dr. Rodric Rhodes stated, “Fatherhood is the most meaningful thing I’ve ever experienced. I love being a father.”
As a woman, I will never have a father’s heart, but my own heart was forever changed by these fathers’ hearts. I left almost every interview in tears feeling so touched by the tender love which I had heard. I witnessed men at their finest, stripped for the moment of sharing about their careers and external accolades, but focused on matters of deeper human value —family love and fellowship.
Today, I am in awe of fathers. When I see one pushing a toddler in a stroller, coaching a soccer team, or helping a young child get safely to the ground from a tall SUV, I smile knowing that I am seeing another wise and devoted dad.
Motivated by love and the desire to pass on the goodness of life to his offspring. I salute you fathers and wish Happy Father’s Day to you all!
Contact Jennifer at jenniferkj@charter.net or www.jenniferkarinjordan.com.
